The people would like to know

VOICEOFREASONOver the last week, we saw tragedies in Virginia and in Dominica: events that hammered home the fragility of life and the transience of it all.

The events in Dominica underscore the importance of national disaster planning and preparedness, because we cannot only wring our hands and hold our hearts at moments like these.  The events in Virginia reminded me to hold those I love closely because at any minute we could lose them.

And then there were the other happenings of the month. Comical or concerning, either way I have a few questions.

Dear Fellow Bajans,

Wait! Have you seen the newly branded Eclipse Biscuits packaging. One question. Why? Every so often, companies try to make old things new by creating new branding, and every so often they get it wrong. This is one such case.

The packaging is retro; but in the most confusing way, given that the previous packaging was pretty good. This takes us back to years when cooked biscuit was as popular as macaroni pie is now.

This is what happens when marketers think too hard. Why?

Madame Tussauds,

You recently unveiled a wax figure of rapper Nicki Minaj. The figure joins the likeness of Kate Middleton, Ed Sheeran, and JLo in the museum. However, unlike many of the other figures
the choice of Minaj’s pose is most curious.

The pose is taken from the music video for Minaj’s hit Anaconda. Apparently, Minaj is as alluring in wax form as she is in real life and so patrons have been taking all sorts of liberties and posing suggestively with her likeness.

Of all the ways Minaj, one of the most popular hip hop artists could have been portrayed, why on all fours? And, Madame, didn’t you imagine that pervy patrons would have been behaving in this way?

Dear Media Managers,

Last week, popular sex worker and social media star Muscle Katt sat down for an interview with SLAM 101.1’s  Lady NV. The interview, from beginning to end was a joke, only because the host made it so.

We do not get the opportunity very often to hear the perspectives of individuals like  Muscle Katt, and in some ways this turned into a circus show. I am not asking you to be Barbara Walters, but I think the topic deserved a little more sobriety than it got.

Is this what national media has come to?

Dear Barbados Cabinet,

So, surprise! The enrolment numbers at the University of the West Indies are reportedly down. So Prime Minister Stuart, Minister Jones, what are we going to do about this tuition policy? Because things are looking grim.

I mean it was once said that the policy was not set in stone. If it still malleable, let us do something about it because it will soon leave the country limp. What are we going to do?

Dear James Paul,

I agree that some teachers may be less committed than teachers used to be. But some parents too are less committed; some parliamentarians are less committed also. We simply cannot place the blame for the deviance of our youth at the feet of teachers alone. What about our spreading the blame around ’cause it is “all ah we”.

Dear United States Legislature,

After the gruesome shootings in Virginia last week, my simple question is: how many more? Columbine. Virginia Tech. Newtown.
The Colorado theatre shootings.

Again and again, guns get into the hands of the deranged, leading to the loss of life. But I imagine each country has that thing they ignore to the detriment of their people.

How many more?

To Whom It May Concern:

How can Barbados assist Dominica? Seeing the images out of Dominca last week as it was affected by Tropical Storm Erika broke my heart. I implore every Barbadian to find a way of contributing to relief efforts. It could have been us.

In many ways, it can still be us. Of course, the question is: are you prepared?

Dear Universe,

It is still hard for me to believe that the presidential campaign of Donald Trump is anything other than a joke. But last week it got funnier. The Donald had Univision  journalist Jorge Ramos ejected from a presser, as Ramos was pushing him on his controversial position regarding immigration.

Listen, the bravado and blustering of Trump should be a case study in both politics and psychology. I have never seen anything like it.

But hear the best, a fortnight ago a big man sat down with Sarah Palin for an interview (I used that term liberally). The exchange turned into a love fest without any substantive questions or policy positions. Again, a case of the ability of democracy to go very wrong.

All I want to know is when will it end?

Dear Hillary,

What will we do about these emails, my dear? You went from denial to comical, to contrition, and nothing seems to be working. That presidential lead in Iowa, the most important of primary states, seems to be dwindling away ever so slowly.

You’ve been here before, but to think that this is the thing that will derail you this time is kind of sad.

Well, head up, shoulders back, and please no more SnapChat jokes!

Hillary, is this the end?

(Andwele Boyce is a young communicatorwho is passionate about politicsand popular culture.He holds a Master’s in international trade.)

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