Turning de corner
De Vendor, like most Caribbean people, fairly familiar wid corners. We don’t do straight lines; we believe in corners. We don’t like being cornered, ’cause, like a pit bull, we gine fight back if cornered.
In de USA, yuh could be bored stiff driving around, especially in newer places like Las Vegas and Miami, and big cites like Raleigh, and even Manhattan. Everything well laid out; streets running in one direction; avenues in de other; very orderly; very organized and easy to understand. But not in de Caribbean.
We just don’t believe in straight lines; we like li’l curves in de ladies and in de geography.When De Vendor was ’bout 18, he did driving down Black Rock one night ’bout 3.a.m. I was driving straight, but de road was curved. De road wine and de Triumph motor car and De Vendor end up in a wall by Bamboo Gap. Thankfully, both de Triumph Herald and De Vendor survive!
We know too dat in Bubbadus giving instructions gine invariably involve a few corners; strangers coming to yuh house; de directions look like a map of de Middle East –– confused. Imagine getting instructions on how to get to Martins Bay, St John.
“Come up Gun Hill; when yuh pass St George Anglican Church, yuh know yuh pun de right track. Don’t tek de righ turn after de church, ’cause dat gine carry yuh back over to Buckley Factory. By de way, dat close down years ago.
“Come straight up de hill; yuh gine go round a few corners. When yuh see De Lion pun de left of de hill, keep gine up dey. At de top of de hill, iffing yuh mek de left turn, yuh gine end up by de Signal Station.
Yuh don’t want to tek dat turn; so keep coming straight.
“Li’l further up, yuh gine see a shop pun de right. Dat gine carry yuh out by where Mr Dave Barnard used to live and where Roger Smith live out at Moscow. Don’t tek dat turn; keep straight. Yuh gine pass a Water Authority reservoir dat mostly empty dese days; keep going; go past Lemon Arbor. Dat is where dem does mek pudding and souse pun Saturday. And, when yuh reach Four Cross Roads, yes, Four Roads, don’t turn left nor right; travel straight.
“Yuh gine see some cows grazing pun de right; dem belong to Sir Cow. Keep going, and when yuh reach Verdun, ask anybody how to get to Martin’s Bay.”
So yuh see, in Bubbadus, we got plenty corners; so when I hear de term turning de corner, I does sit up and listen carefully.
Poor Bubbadus been getting downgrade after downgrade, year in and year out from Moody’s and from de IMF. In fact, I started to wonder how much further yuh does go before yuh hit rock bottom, and I sure de Minister of Finance and de Government never use to look forward to hearing bout de latest report pun Bubbdus!
Suddenly, de IMF was in town and dis time around dem bringing good news.
De news? Bubbadus Economy Turning De Corner!
So, naturally fuh De Vendor, I want to know which corner we turning. Is it de corner at Hothersal commonly called “De Turning”, ’cause dat would be a big corner. Could it be some other corner? Maybe Diamond Corner in St Peter?
De name Diamond would send a nice message, but I suspect the Opposition would prefer dat de IMF use Pie Corner representing pie in de sky!
I would hope too dat de good news dat de economy grew by 0.8 per cent would mean dat we coming up from either Prescod Bottom or more appropriately dat part of St George known as Sweet Bottom!
De Lord knows, dese past few years we been somewhere out to sea by Bottom Bay!
I Market Vendor gone fuh now.
You have a blessed and a wonderful day, yuh hear?