What matters most

It is very funny when you think of the things that matter to some but just don’t register with most.

Those things that you really have little or no time to even think about as you go on with your day-to-day chores that when they are finally brought to your attention you can do nothing else but wonder if it is for real.

As a child growing up everything you ate or drank came from the fridge or the cupboard or in some households the “larder”. The supermarket was also a place we enjoyed going to, given the opportunity. Those who knew of fruit trees and vegetable gardens were the fortunate ones who had an idea that food was also grown, but we really could care less as long as we had a good meal.

The time to think of the hard work that goes into making the products and growing the food never mattered. We ate and we played and we used the toilet and washroom facilities and we slept and awoke to go through our usual routine. Nothing mattered at all besides the time we got to eat and drink.

Hearing the news the other day about toilet paper and the possible shortage of it really made me pause to see if I was hearing right. Now let me say that I got the info from a secondary source, so hearing that it was primary news in the paper had me laughing. I may be wrong but my source said that the toilet paper we have been using is not up to standard.

I have never been to the supermarket or to the washroom and wonder if the paper on the roll is of the highest quality. All I am interested in is the fact that there is enough on the roll because I only remembered after I sat to do my performance that I should have checked first. The texture, colour or ply never crosses my mind. Maybe it does cross somewhere else but it just never matters to me.

I have heard many stories about toilet tissue before, but hearing about purchasing it to match the decor of the washroom really had me cracking up. The colour of it never matters to me or many, because no matter what colour it was at the start it is destined to be one colour at the end of its use.

Now don’t get me wrong here, because I wouldn’t want to be using sand paper textured tissue or any that felt like foil, but when the performance is over and you reach for that roll you will only know of the texture as you get down to the butt of the task at hand.

I know of some who take their toilet paper so seriously that they stand in the aisle reading the package. I never do such a thing at all. Some are so concerned with the absorbency that they can tell you which brand is most likely to do the job best.

As long as the roll has paper I will pull and ball and fold as I need to maximise absorbency so it doesn’t matter to me.

Now on a more serious note with the toilet paper: If there was indeed a shortage on the island, what do you think will happen? Being a tourist destination, the foreign press would publish it all over the place. Travel advisories would be saying things like, “Barbados unable to clean your mess”, or “Travel to Barbados will result in extended dirty bottoms”.

I believe if there had to be a shortage that newspapers and magazines will get extended use. Recycling will be taken to a different level and you could choose the section you want to do the job. The children could have the comic section and the older family members could battle for the political sections. (Fortunately Barbados Today will not be part of that process).

Whichever section tickles your fancy it will be up to you, but as far as I am concerned we will not have any toilet paper shortage any time soon. I prefer baby wipes when and wherever possible but until there is the possibility of the mess getting out of hand or on hands, the process remains the same. No ifs butts or maybes.

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