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After me – or my wife?

Why is it that women are always looking to cause strife?

That’s my question to you as we start this new year. A successful and healthy new year to you and the staff at Barbados Today.

I was compelled to write this letter seeking advice after a co-worker decided to start tormenting me and my wife of 11 years after the office party around Christmas.

It is utter foolishness!!

She came to the party alone and I don’t know why she set her sights on me because prior to the party we never had a long conversation, in fact, all I ever said was “hi” and “how are doing”.

My wife was standing next to me when she came over and introduced herself, telling her she heard so much about her and wanted to meet the woman she was, what do you Bajans say, horning.

Even though she said she was joking, me and my wife were not amused. We have always had a good relationship and never once did the thought of cheating on each other come up.

The woman wouldn’t disappear even though they were single men from the office trying to get her to dance, to talk, to move. Everywhere we went in the room she found herself close to us so she could talk to my wife, who eventually told her off loud enough for everyone to hear.

After that she left the party.

Since then she’s been turning up at our home, events we go to, the supermarket and my wife is ready to get violent.

She went so far as to call my wife at work and tell her she was with me and what we were doing. She didn’t know we were on the phone with each other at that same time. That call was strange because she doesn’t talk to me at work at all.

She called my wife again and invited her out. We are wondering if she’s after me or her. That apart, what can we do because I don’t want to get her fired but her behaviour is worrying us, should we report this to the police.

We live in another island and not to say the police are inept but they might just blow this off.

Help us please!

— R.F.

Since yuh asked, RF, I am tempted to tell you to “Give de woman a hard slap!”; but that would be against the law and bad advice. I suggest that as a first step, regardless of your doubt, that you and your wife make a report to the police. Even if it does not get her to stop, you would have placed on the record the fact that you and your wife are being harassed by this woman.

If that does not work, I suggest you get a lawyer to write her threatening to take her to court. I a reasonably sure one of these two methods should be enough to set a sane person back on the straight and narrow path.

But you also have to consider that while we may think that she is just a wicked woman, it may be that she has a genuine mental/medical problem for which she needs help, and since it would not be advisable for you or your wife to suggest this to her, if she does not stop then you may have to involve your bosses at work, since it may take the threat of dismissal to force her to seek medical help.

Take this course and write back and let me know how it turns out.

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